


Sorry We Ate Your Godbaby

by letsmoveourbootybutts



Category: Superjail! (Cartoon)
Genre: Childhood Memories, Fluff, Friendship, Infanticide, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Post-Canon, Protective Siblings, Xeno
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-03
Updated: 2019-05-03
Packaged: 2020-02-16 11:34:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 816
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18690661
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/letsmoveourbootybutts/pseuds/letsmoveourbootybutts
Summary: The Twins speak with Alice while she mourns the loss of the warbuxx bud.





	Sorry We Ate Your Godbaby

While Alice drowned her sorrow and emptied her pockets at the closest stripper bar from the outmost outer zone, the Twins returned to their quarters for the night. In a rare and tender moment of pure instinct, the one who had not carried the burden of the budding stayed up and kept watch while his brother slept. The skin on his stomach was still soft and red and raw from the bud growing so rapidly, his nipples swollen and his hair tacky with dried sweat. He roused slowly after his sleep cycle had completed, at which point the sun had barely risen in the sky.

“I believe we should take an off day.”

“Agreed. Let us groom ourselves and binge on entertainment over snacks.”

They went about their morning routine, phasing off the sweat and grime of the previous day, consuming various supplements and doing their aerobics before summoning up some salt licks to work on and comfy pajamas to wear. One activated the main screen and began scrolling through the security camera footage. The large-headed human combing his hair, prisoners sleeping, a manticore tearing its way through a cell block with a litter of cubs following behind, standard stuff. However there was one thing that was perplexing and required further investigation. Their bud-steward was in the package sorting facility, wrapping up her half of the warbuxx in paper and looking profoundly dejected. 

“She hasn't eaten it?”

“She seems distressed. Was it not to her taste?”

“Did we cross some aspect of the humans’ culture?”

“Let us hope not. Perhaps it would be polite to check in.”

They teleported to the package sorting facility, spooking Alice into dropping the box she was about to put her half of the warbuxx in. 

“What the hell are you BOGO twinks doing here?”

“Um.” “Err.” “We wanted to check in after the budding.” “To see if the warbuxx was acceptable to your human tastebuds.”

Alice scowled and loomed over them. “No, because I'm not some kind of infanticidal freakshow. Hey, actually, we need to fucking talk. What was up with that? I was going to be a godmommy and you ate your goddamn baby.”

The twin who had born the bud recoiled from her imposing physique while his brother held his hands out. “The warbuxx bud would not have survived twenty four of your human hours.” “It hatches prematurely. It has severely stunted muscular, brain and organ functions.”

Alice paused. “Wait, that was a preemie? It seemed fine. I've seen preemies, they're tiny. They can barely move. I know you guys are like, aliens or whatever but I don't get it. I just don't.” 

The twins glanced at each other before taking in Alice's distress fully. They cautiously extended their hands toward her slumped shoulders for a comforting pat. “There seems to have been some confusion.” “Would you like to know what our species looks like as infants?” “So you feel less grief for something that was barely alive?” “That could never survive?”

“Sure, I guess.”

The one who had given birth phased a small holographic screen out of nowhere and pulled up a picture.

“This is us the morning after we hatched.”

The picture was of two coltish young boys, about the size of four year olds, with fluffs of blond hair and thick unibrows. They were clad in blue robes and sleeping next to each other in a vaguely organic looking pod, mouths agape revealing needly little teeth. 

“Well weren't you the cutest little guys? Oh my God I want to just muss up your hair” she cooed. “Wait, one day old? So you guys are kinda like horses I guess?”

They shrugged in unison. “I suppose so.” “Horses are the ones with the hooves, right?” 

“Yup. Say, uh, got any more pictures? There's kind of a baby shaped hole in my heart right now that needs filling.”

They swiped to another picture of the two little boys, wide awake now and shredding up a pair of platform heels with their vicious little fangs, and a picture taken immediately after of one of them lunging towards the camera with a snarl.

“So you two were always little monsters? Seems about right. And it's just a thing in your culture that you….eat babies that don't work out?”

They both nodded. “Affirmative.” “Does that help you feel less distressed?”

“Eh, kind of.” Her comm beeped. “I've got more questions but I gotta get to the main office before Jared crawls up my ass about it. See you later?”

“A cultural exchange would be most enlightening.” “We must talk over caffeinated beverages sometime.” 

They teleported out, leaving Alice to address her package and go to work. As planned, they spent the rest of their day watching videos and recovering. Tomorrow they would be back on their bullshit, but maybe not until after chatting with their new friend some more.

**Author's Note:**

> i have so many goddamn headcanons for how this species works and I can't stop thinking about precocial feral baby twins. My city now


End file.
